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WHAT'S IMPORTANT TO YOU? all i want to do is get to know a special woman and be a great friend. don't get me wrong- i don't want to go shopping with you, i don't want to watch the Lifetime Channel with you, and i definitely don't want to spend every waking moment listening to you about your boyfriend. however, it would be nice to meet someone who is funny and witty and smart, but has enough issues to also be interesting and real!! chemistry is important to me, but not the kind. it is easier to remove any pretense of pressure and expectations so we can just be ourselves, for better or worse, without worrying about "performing" or having to measure ourselves against previous partners, etc. a relaxed relationship is always more rewarding and more fun than trying to impress one another. anyway, i know there are women who would appreciate meeting a guy who thinks like this. i am new to the area and would like to develop a relationship with someone close enough to get together when we both want to, far enough away to remind each other that this is about friendship not regular "hook ups." i work a lot, i have a son who i see regularly during the week, and i find time to exercise. that leaves me enough time to be fun and charming later in the evening and on weekends. my job has some downtime -early afternoon- enough to communicate with my special lady. looks, shape, color, , money, none of that means anything to me. age does only because i have no idea how to talk to women these days and most of the "older" women i talk to want a boy toy. so be between 30 and 50 please or at least be able to fake it well!! good luck getting one over on me though, if i haven't done it, i have seen it. and if i haven't done or seen it, i have heard enough about it to talk about it. nothing shocks me anymore. so be of mind, uninhibited, honest, forthright, non-judgmental, and RELAXED. in return, i will be attentive, helpful, fun, charming, witty, super smart, and full of handsomeness. lol. looking forward to hearing from you.
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I still miss you. You came back after six months of hell just to leave again after a month. I haven't seen you since Jan 16, haven't talked to you on the since around February and haven't tried to text you since about a month and a half ago. I dont even know if you have your same number anymore because either you ignored everything i wrote when i tried to make peace with you, or you changed your number so you never got any of my texts. It was almost impossible to just be friends with you because im still in love with you and i just wanted a chance to show you that, but you are too scared or your mom wont let you even try to be with me again. After all we had for years, i would never hurt you and i wanted to start anew, but you never let us see where it would go. I tried to go out with other girls and I always still wanted you and not them. No matter how many of them wanted me to be their boyfriends I constantly said no because I still love and want you. No matter what they said about how great a guy i was and how handsome I am and good hearted and how they would treat me like a king, I pushed them aside because I love you and only want you. I tried to move on. I really did, but I think Im capable of even trying to have anything with anyone else. I need to heal from you rejecting me and not wanting me in your life anymore and why?? All i did was try to be with you and you cut me off. You threw me away like a piece of trash and like I mean nothing. Thats harsh, when I did nothing wrong to you but love you. I even paid your bill and gave you money for things so you would be happy, even knowing you didn't want me anymore. Well, I guess I'm a damn fool for thinking you care anymore. Your school is your life now, but I still could've been a part of it if you really wanted me too. Thats the thing. You don't. I guess all I can say is that I still love you very much and I hope your happy with school and your canada boyfriend who you love so much and obviously more than me. Maybe one day you will see what I meant in your life. One day... There is nothing left for me to do or say. I tried my best and you built a wall between us so thick and high that I'm not strong enough to conquer it. Only you can. I love you always and forever. Hope life is good to you and maybe I can find someone one day who I can try to love again even though it will never compare to what I had and still have for you.. T.O.Y. kitten XOXO
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